Being Gay in the army -What is it REALLY like, truthfully?

[kzy86]

...And there is no need for personal insults about my previous job. I left for my own reasons and own choice and with a good record -no disciplinary matters. I feel the tone of that comment was entirely inappropriate.

And with a swish of his golden locks and a dismissive shrug of his broad...almost MASCULINE shoulders, Mr K-Y gathered up his manbag and flounced off into the sunset, never to be heard from on this forum again.....

The End.[/color

But I don't think anyone would truly say that someone who is OVERTLY gay would last 5 minutes at the beginning of the whole joining up process.... (This is blokes I'm talking about.) Lipstick before parade, posters of Gareth Thomas, Gay Pride T-shirts in the NAAFI bar and asking lads in your troop if they want to come round to your accommodation "coz you're wanting to spit-roast your boyfriend" is NOT going to go down too well.

In The Beginning.... you are broken down and reshaped from a civvy slob into a soldier. If you're determined to stand out from the crowd by waving the Gay Flag then expect the hyenas to circle. Everything that goes wrong in training will be SOMEONE's fault and it'll be yours...
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Does all this not demonstate how immature you are underneath all your "advice" ? What makes you think people will be like this in training? What makes you think I am like this? Don't bore the forum with this nonsense and pretend you are Mr Liberal because you are not.

[MSI64]

Have worked in Basic training and this is exactly how it is.
Your smallest differences become big issues for people. You will be housed with the same people day and night for 14 weeks. Not a moment of your time will be your own.
At some point you are going to fall out with someone and the gay issue will come to the fore.
If you make a big thing about it someone will realize this is your button and will keep pressing it.
Fit in with the majority and you will be fine try and stand out and it will be your own fault.
This applies across the board trust me Gay/Ginger/fat/thin what ever it is it will be used at some point by either your fellow recruits or an Instructor its not personal its just banter.

I now stand by for the PC Brigade to start their assault. But before you start please bear in mind that I got promoted from my time at a training establishment, I have seen recruits years later who have had no problem with me and later this year I will be returning to the Training World as a SSM!

[kzy86]

MSI 64, i couldn't agree more. I can assure you I'm not in the PC Bridade by the way and never will be. I'm not completely politically correct. Who is?
I am thankful for the useful advice from some people on this forum. I'm also thankful for the insults from the idiots too, especially that brain dead prick who called me a fag (and then got defensive when someone pointed out his flair for being a complete w@#k -who's the 'sensitive' one now eh?) and the pond life creature that called me "Mr K-Y" and went on about 'blonde locks' or something. He obviously must think i'm Prince Charming from Shrek or something. I love it when people presume.
For the record, it's not me who's making a big deal about it. All i want to do is fit in, not stand out. And speaking honestly, despite how some of the people on this forum are trying to paint me, being gay really is the lowest thing on my list, when it comes to joining. I would much PREFER people and Instructors to give me loads of banter about it, than not say anything at all, because it removes tension and makes everyone else much more comfortable with it, then the whole thing can regarded as unimportant and irrelevant to the job, (which it is) and move on -and more importantly, it's funny as hell! Like MSI 64 said "it's not personal, it's just banter".

It's just a shame that some people on this forum have me down as being ultra-sensitive with no sense of humour. I can promise you I am not like that. If you knew me personally, you'd know that. I know i've sounded a bit sensitive in the past few blogs, that I admit to, but that's just down to me being argumentative, not sensitive. But before someone points out how i should "not join because your attitude is so bad", and that i am " a pathetic human being", even though they don't know me or have never met me, that doesn't mean i'm going to argue with people every second, nor that I will try and argue with instructors and higher ranks once in training. After all, i'm not five.

I hope this clears a few things up. Does anyone sane out there see where i'm coming from? Answers (or death threats) on a postcard

MSI 64, Good luck on your return to training as an SSM mate - i do mean that sincerely, honest! What's that I can hear people saying? I've changed my tune? Yeah, I have. Don't like it? Well i'm afraid that's just tough titty - you can't please everyone! I do respect all staff including senior staff in the forces. We all have our faults and I can admit when I am occasionally wrong, so deal with it.

[sportbilly42]

Please accept my humble apologies for my insensitive post princess....

Don't bore the forum with this nonsense and pretend you are Mr Liberal because you are not.

Don't blame me.... I didn't vote for Nick Clegg or any of his band of sycophants.....







Now.... Where's that K-Y...?

[kzy86]

Please accept my humble apologies for my insensitive post princess....

Don't bore the forum with this nonsense and pretend you are Mr Liberal because you are not.

Don't blame me.... I didn't vote for Nick Clegg or any of his band of sycophants.....







Now.... Where's that K-Y...?

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hahaha i like your sarcasm sportbilly, u remind me of a younger me!
You'll be glad to know i never voted Nick 'the Plebb' Clegg either.

Oh, and the KY is on your dad's bedside table

[sportbilly42]

Oh, and the KY is on your dad's bedside table

Nah.... He prefers gerbils...

[ofens]

Why don't you just shut up and just join the army, and stop bitching about your private life and seeking attention on here?

[gunner75]

If your in and people are none the wiser then it will be irrelevant. Like all walks of life if your a good egg and get along with people and get the job done then you'll be ok. Even if its out in the open you should know what to expect anyway being an (ex?) copper. Iv no doubt the fuzz, behind closed doors, have banter now and then. Bit of ribbing, piss taking perhaps? Really though based on my experiences working alongside (openly gay bloke) no one actually gives a toss. worse you'll get is people being initially stand offish maybe roll of the eyes, a few snidey remarks. Im sure your able to deal/handle with that. Its probably more relevant as to how you mix and get on with people and if your job capable. just dont start dry humping anything that bends over wearing khaki ;o) ... and that was a joke!

[AIRBUS]

[/quote]
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hahaha i like your sarcasm sportbilly, u remind me of a younger me!
[/quote]

KZY

I think you will find that sportbilly is a little older than you (or me !)

Sportbilly is from a point in time when it was HOMOSEXUALITY WAS ILEGAL IN THE ARMED FORCES.

Thankfully those days have long since passed and only the attitudes remain in an increasingly small minority.

As I and others have said its how you do your job that counts.
There are gay soldiers but many more soldiers who happen to be gay !

SOME SOLDIERS ARE GAY GET OVER IT

[sportbilly42]

I think you will find that sportbilly is a little older than you (or me !)

...sadly true.... 50 and counting Spent last weekend painting some Go Faster stripes on the zimmerframe

I ALSO come from a time.... long, long ago.... when the word 'gay' meant happy (and then along came Larry Grayson.... )

As I and others have said its how you do your job that counts.

As I said as well, if there's someone who joins up and makes a big deal of the 'gay issue' in the early days of training, and gets their knickers in a twist when someone makes a comment (rather than laughing it off) they may identify themselves as an easy target for some verbal abuse when things go tits up.... Unless you're lucky enough to have a fat useless clusterfcuk slob who can't march in your troop who will be the natural prey and favourite target for the JNCO trainers, you just want to keep that part of your private life private. Just do your job and nobody will care.

On a plus note the other guys in your troop won't be in competition with you for the local camp bikes....!

[gunner75]

Unless you're lucky enough to have a fat useless clusterfcuk slob who can't march in your troop who will be the natural prey and favourite target

yeah, pick on fat boy why dont you...;o)

[sportbilly42]

Well..... you just WOULD, wouldn't you?

[gunner75]

he is a human being and has feelings too ya know.....;O) but if i were the bloke behind carrying the gimpy id be thinkin 'next time YOUR carrying this you FAT f*ckin SLUG.

[lewisshepherd]

I have to agree with the vast majority here.
And as a film geek I'm going to use a popular film quote

"If you don't like the answers given, maybe you should cese asking scary questions"

That's from pulp fiction by the way, a classic.

I'd like to add I personally have nothing against homosexuality, I have many gay friends but I think the army, like many institutions has its share of bigotry, im not telling you to pretend to be something your not but don't make a huge deal of it and no one else will think about it this way you wouldn't walk in to any other job and discuss your sexually weather gay or straight sure if someone asks you about it by all means tell them the truth but don't single yourself out and I truly believe nobody else will.
I'd just like to add that I wish you the best of luck.

[Millar]

I have to agree with the vast majority here.
And as a film geek I'm going to use a popular film quote

"If you don't like the answers given, maybe you should cese asking scary questions"

That's from pulp fiction by the way, a classic.

I'd like to add I personally have nothing against homosexuality, I have many gay friends but I think the army, like many institutions has its share of bigotry, im not telling you to pretend to be something your not but don't make a huge deal of it and no one else will think about it this way you wouldn't walk in to any other job and discuss your sexually weather gay or straight sure if someone asks you about it by all means tell them the truth but don't single yourself out and I truly believe nobody else will.
I'd just like to add that I wish you the best of luck.

Couldn't have put it better myself. Although this thread was dead along time ago lol