A detailed review of the Para's Insight Course!!

[Grimey Vibes]

Parachute Regiment Insight Course July 2004

Friday

I arrived at the station at 1940 and waited to be picked up by the soldier in uniform on the hour, every hour from 1700 until 2300. No one turned up, it was 2015 by the time me and one other lad (Who was with his 22yr career retired Staff Sgt from REME) had decided to ring up and see what was happening with transport. The Private answered and said we had read the instructions on the form we were sent and he then came to pick us up. When he arrived we got in the van when the other lads dad went up to the private and started to have a go at him for being late etc. Not a good idea as even if he was an ex Staff Sgt, he was a crap hat in the privates eyes, ex Staff Sgt or not. We then arrived at Calvary Barracks where it was guarded by a Para in Uniform, Beret and a Loaded SA80; he looked the bee’s knees. Then we got to where we were staying went inside and told to grab a ‘Scoff’ bag (Para talk for food) and then told where to stay.
I choose my bed, had some scoff and then went to look at the posters and information boards when this private came out and said so he was your dad then? I said no way it’s his dad, the guy stood next to me who I met at the train station. From then on this guy was not in his good books. I went to bed early because we were to be awoken at 0600, but I found it hard to sleep in anticipation to the weekend ahead.

Saturday

I awoke at 0530 and got up, had some of the scoff I saved to line my stomach incase we were to be doing exercise before breakfast. We was not ‘woken’ up until 0630 in which we had to rush handing out of kit which were green overalls, numbered bib, helmet, cup and water bottle. We were then told to get in PT gear which was advised to be shorts and t-shirt because wearing tracksuit bottoms makes you sweat more and slows you down which increases your run time. We then were then told that we did not put our overalls on and here came our first thrashing (beasting), press up position down, up, down, up, down, up etc then told to stand up and get in our overalls. Already people were moaning about it being to early for exercise. We then went off for scoff and it was really nice, I didn’t expect it to be nice but it was gorgeous. We had scoff in 3 Para’s lunch hall. We went for a course brief and what it was all about when this guy was asked a question and he called the Sgt “mate” to which the reply was straight faced from the Sgt “don’t ever call me mate again or I will knock your f@#k teeth out.” We then watched a few videos on the Para’s and then went back to where we was staying to get out of overalls and ready for the BFT and max press-ups and sit-ups in 2 minutes.
We walked to the local park where we got into 2’s in a line for the first part to the BFT, the 1.5m warm up. We did the warm up in march speed to start off with then to double march which knackered me out. Then we had to do the 1.5m run best effort straight after it. I got 11.23 and was pissed off with myself because at home I was doing 8.50-9.10, it was doing that first 1.5m that I never used to do before my best effort, also this 1.5m seemed a lot bigger than the one I was running. We were then asked our times to which everyone got 10 press-ups after it. When we were all doing press ups we were called f@#k stupid civvies and to address them all by staff after each sentence. I was asked my time by the person who was marking them down to which I replied “11.23”, I heard down and give me 10. I knew what I had done wrong and always said staff after everything, well nearly all the time after that. We went straight into the 2 minute press-ups best effort, right after I had just done 20. I got 56; I heard “well done, shit run time” from the scouse Para that was one of the people running the course. We then went into sit-ups best effort and I got 56 again, I got this pain in my thighs after about 40, it was agony. I beat the scores for best effort press-ups and sit-ups which gave me a little boost of morale. This ginger guy from Leeds nicknamed Guano by the scouse Para had done a shitty run time of about 14 minutes, hardly broke a sweat and got one press-up and about 4 sit-ups got a little cocky with the Sgt who then said “if you think you are hard then f@#k come on, you little shit heads, if anyone here thinks they can knock me out step up because I will knock each and everyone of your f@#k heads off” I thought nah you are ok I am here to finish the insight course, not go home in a stretcher with a black eye and a broken jaw.
After we finished the tests we went back to our accommodation and told to line up in rank (Which is in three’s.) Here was Thrashing number two which was run to the wall and back, no one sprinted and jogged it. “That was not good enough, do it again and the last 3 will be repeating it” I ran as fast as I could and was not in the last three but we all still had to do it again. When we got back to the start it was press-up position, down, up, down, up, half-way, up, down up etc. People were jacking left right and center which made it worse because we had to do more. Then we were told we had 20 minutes to get a shower and be outside in rank. When I came out of the shower there was the goby guy who was in cadets when he was younger with his stuff all packed and he had had enough already. We never saw him again.
After another beasting for some people being late we went to the Regimental headquarters to have a lesson on weapons of the Parachute Regiment. Here we got a lesson on mortars, SA80, an SA80 with tripod and extended barrel, can’t remember the name of it and the GMPG. We were taught about these and got to have a feel of them all. You couldn’t fire them but it felt good when I had the SA80 in my hands, the GMPG is a heavy weapon. One guy who was going on with himself on how to make bombs was holding the GMPG; the Sgt’s seen him holding it. He took it off him and said what are you doing? You are holding it like you hold your boyfriend and took it off him and started to take the piss holding it like a queer and puckering his lips, he then shown him how to properly hold it. After that the lad tried to pass it off onto me but I said I don’t want to get into trouble when the staff sees all the kiss marks all over it, to which everyone laughed again.
After the lesson it was time for more scoff at the 3 Para’s lunch hall. Then back off to the Regimental Headquarters for some command tasks and some more thrashing. When we had completed a couple of tasks we were taken off for the ‘Scouse Olympics’ by the scouse Para. We had to carry our partner like a baby to this wall and then do 15 press ups and then change over and your partner carried you back to another 20 press ups. Then he kept adding more stuff like running with them in a fireman’s carry there and back doing the 15 and 20 press ups, and then he added a piggyback there and back with the 15 and 20 press ups. I was thinking this is going to be solid, and then he said we have to start off with 20 press ups, on the count of Guano who could only do one press-up earlier. When we finished 20 press-ups he told us to stand up and get our stuff, we all looked at him confused and he told us he just wanted one person to jack and we were going to do it, he said it’s all a game and it’s all in the mind. No one jacked, or so he thought because resident bomb expert was saying he can’t do it and wants to quit, thankfully he wasn’t heard.
Then it was off to the Assault Course. When we arrived I couldn’t help but say wow, because I have always wanted to have a go at one and this was the first time and it looked good. We all had a go at each individual object so we knew what to do. People were talking and not getting into rank proper so we got a few beastings as well. Then we had a warm up that seemed to kill us all because after it we felt worse than the 3 mile BFT that morning. Then we had some water and lay down on the floor in two lines and had to race against the man next to you. After we finished the Assault Course we had to sprint the 400-500m back to the start which was tiring because we had just done the Assault Course as fast as possible. Everyone had bits of skin ripped off their hands from the ropes and we were told we had to do it again all together. After this time I was trying to sprint back and the Corporal told me to catch up with the man in front, then he said no beat him or you are doing it again. The lad in front was well ahead of me and I sprinted as fast as I could but beat him and was completely knackered and felt like I couldn’t do anymore. Then it was another thrashing because some people were walking back instead of running. So then they said line up, you are doing it again. I thought oh god not again, but I wasn’t not going to do it. Then he said does anyone want to quit, he said its easy just say no and you don’t have to do it, anyone who doesn’t go and stand at the fence. Guano went to the fence and he was with bomb expert who couldn’t even do the team go at the Assault Course. Then they said ready, steady, Stand Up!!! We didn’t have to do it, there was more mind games being played with us to see who wasn’t prepared to go through it again. He told us Guano and bomb expert had booked them selves a seat home on the train tonight.
We went back for a shower and told to get into smart clothes for scoff. Again after we had finished showering we got another beasting. Back at the accommodation we were told that was it for today and you have the time to yourselves to get beers for the people old enough if you want. Then suddenly we had 10 minutes to get everyone outside in rank. So I went around knocked on all doors and we were out there in 5 minutes so that he did not have an excuse to thrash us again. Out comes the Corporal and we were not all there, press-up position down, up, half-way, down, up etc. We had to do this until the 2 who were not there turned up. 10 minutes later they strolled up and were at the fence looking at the armed Para. Then he told us does anyone want to go home?? So you all want to be in the Parachute Regiment then?? I answered Yes Staff along with the rest of the lads. His reply was you must be mad, I will never ever go back there and go through that shit again. “Right fence and back” another thrashing was our reward for not jacking in. I had a chat with the scouse Para and then went to bed, only to be woken up a 2100 for another thrashing. We were told to drink as much water as possible to re-hydrate our bodies because we are going to need it.

Sunday

We was woken up at 0500 and got more thrashing to get the blood running and our bodies ready for the Log Race. One of the videos we were shown was one of P Company, it shown every event and the Sgt told us how the hardest event is the 2 miles of hills carrying a 60Kg log between 12 people is the most demanding part of P Company. We had to do it between 8 people but with a lighter log over an unknown distance, this was to separate the men from the boys. At 0700 we were having a warm up that again felt like we were dead for the log race. We were separated into 2 teams and on my team we had the 3 weakest and laziest c@#t you have ever seen, they never put any effort in and we were always getting us thrashed because of it. The other team went well ahead of us because Guano never put any effort in, he just rang along with the rope slacked and the corporal just pulled him off it and told him to get in the van. We were running as fast as we could with this log and it was agony, then one another of the Lazy lads jacked and the log seemed to double in weight. At the back were me and another one of the lazy lads with 4 at the front. We just got up a hill part and then the lazy lad next to me jacked and the log just suddenly tripled in weight and I felt like I couldn’t go no more. I shouted for a lad at the front to drop back and help because I won’t be able to hold much longer. Instead one of the Para’s lifted the back of it up and dropped it and it was agony and I still didn’t let go and then one of the lads still left helped out and came to the back. We had been on this log for what seemed eternity and never ending when one of the Para’s jolted the log forward causing me to lose balance, when I was just about to get my balance he jolted it forward again, my hand slipped and I couldn’t hold on. I got up and slammed my hands on my helmet and screamed in anger, all I heard was a Para running up beside me saying hurry sprint back and get hold of it there is only 300m to go. I sprinted as fast as I could and got back on the back and we made it to the end. We put the log down and I nearly fell over I was that knackered. No one jacked on the other team and they completed way before us and we had only 5 left of 8 which made it harder for us. They then marked us down and I heard the Para in charge of us say everyone who finished worked there arse’s off but yellow number 2 fell off and ran back and got hold of it, so don’t mark him off as jacking. I felt relieved because they told us if you come off, that’s it you have failed. Then the 3 who jacked got shouted at saying they will never be Para’s. That’s was it no more physical for the rest of the course we can now relax. We were told we could have as much food as we want because we have earned it. So we went to scoff and we all stuffed our faces, when the Corporal went to put his tray in the rack he dropped his glass and the lads laughed. Big mistake because one of the Other Para’s said one of them said Bobby Charlton dropped his glass, of course we didn’t he was just rubbing it in. “Right, funny was it, outside now!!” Oh shit we all moaned at the lad who laughed and we were told to sprint to the army car things, we all stuffed our faces with food and I got a huge stitch on my way to the cars but we had to sprint because we didn’t fancy another run there again. We then got in the mini buses and went back to accommodation for 20 minutes to ourselves. Then all I heard was outside now in rank, yes some people were just strolling along and we got another thrashing. We then took the log backs to Regimental Headquarters and did some memory games and an observation game. Then we were told we had not spotted all the things, we had one more go at looking out to see if we can spot when suddenly someone was shooting at us. I ducked down when suddenly a sniper stood up and was there right in front of us all along and we didn’t know. I was just stood there in shock with amazement. We then got a lesson on the parachute and went back for a course de-brief and a few more videos. The Sgt in charge told us a few stories about his operations like the one in Sierra Leone against the West Side boys and a few others like one of the Para’s (The PTI and Sniper Corporal) in Iraq when them RMP were killed in Iraq, he was one of the Para’s sent to rescue them when his helicopter was showered with bullets, his mates were hit and through luck he was not even hit by a single bullet. But he does not like to talk about it. Then the Sgt told us that only 3 would be put forward to our AFCO to apply for the Parachute Regiment, the rest had to get fitter and book their ideas up while some will never serve with the Parachute Regiment based on there performance on this course. I had a chat afterwards because I wanted to know if I was on of the three, he said yes, just get my run time down which then said follow the fitness program in the handbook and then In a months time I will be ready for selection. Then we got a scoff bag, a course handbook and were taken to the train station.
On the train home we had a good laugh about what had happened and then departed.

This report does not include all the beastings because we were thrashed constantly through out the weekend. It was a lot of fun and I am glad that I tried my hardest and they think I am Para material, the scouse Para said that I had the mentality that all Para’s have and gave me some advice about getting through Basic.
If you think you are going for a weekend of them being nice to get you to join you have another thing coming because that’s not what they are there for. The course is an Insight into the Parachute Regiment and it’s up to you to decide if you can be a Para after being on the course. I am going to my AFCO tomorrow to talk about it and I am going to have to get my run time down before I can be off to RSC, so another month to a month and a half and I will be on my way. After being on this course I want to be a Para more than anything and I am going to work my arse off to get there. I am full of motivation and I tabbed back from the train station back home because of this, even though I was aching right through my body. It taught me a lot of things about myself and I now have the utmost respect for any Para having been on this. Being a Para is certainly not given to you, it’s earned and this is no where near how bad it is at Basic. So good luck to all who want to be a Paratrooper, because you are going to need it just as much as me.

[Chappy]

Very informative and interesting read, well done and wish you well mate.

[Ploggers]

Good write up. You seem to have the right attitude which as you have seen is a huge part of what they want. I've never done P Company myself but in a lot of ways you need the same "I will not give in" thought process as you do for the Commando Course.

There is always lots of advice in any training unit on the best way to make it. They usually revolve around holding something back at the start in order to appear to improve. From your comments you seem to have the right mindset which is; I'll give it everything I've got at all times".

I notice you live in Derby, I'm across the way in Nottingham. If it helps, I can put you in touch with a few ex para's (Falklands era) local to you. I hate to say it but they are good decent guys! They might help prepare you for the real thing.

Good luck mate I get the feeling you will be fine.

[Edwards159]

Good Account!!!! My insight weekend is in August so i best get training. Once again Wicked account!! Cheers!!

[joethejudge]

Congratulations mate.
Sounds like you had a rough time but held fast and made it.
Well done.

[Wings]

Sounded like you had a good time mate!

Well done for getting through!



Wings

[ED]

Good insight.
As you say, just make sure you get that run time down quite a bit because it will need to be quicker. A couple of months of concentrating on your running and you should be fine.
Cheers,
ED.

[Ed Morgan]

Mate that was a right beasting of a weekend compared to when I did it!

We didnt have to do the log race thank god, and its nice to know that its not just me that thought that the 1 1/2 mile seemed more like 2 miles!

Congrats on having a good time anyway man...

I also had a top weekend.

Ed

[Edwards159]

Just did the insight,, Exactly the same as the account.. Cheers for the info

[mancuniankid]

Good report wez, its alot more detailed than what you've told me on the phone.

Very proud of you bro and i really hope u make it. It will give me someone to look up to, and more motivation for when i re apply for the marines.

Well Done

Future_Marine

[smiler127]

what a weekend, sound brilliant cant wait!!!

good luck mate.

[MrMitty]

A realy good thread - well done and good luck. "Utrinque Paratus"

[mike_B]

Sounds like you had a good time. Well done - just get out running!

Oh - and with regards to the Log Race: They say stay on or come off unconscious. Unfortunately mine was the latter, but surprisingly I wasn't marked down for it. Just goes to show.

Mike_b

[Grimey Vibes]

Mike, Did you do the Insight Course Log Race?? Or did you do the P Company Log Race??

[Pheonix19]

Sounds similar to what I went through back in November 2003. Few extra things we did back then, but the staff who run the insight course constantly change, so the course obviously changes alot too. Just have to imagine that now, more intense, and 7 days a week for 26 weeks when you get to ITC(C). Great Fun!

Just remember, anyone joining the paras, more than not, the things you will do are more mentally challenging than physical. You must carry on beyond breaking point, even when every part of your body is telling you too stop. Good luck...